Osozaki Blooms -- Chapter 3
Nuriko stared at the empty spot where Miaka had stood a moment ago and felt
his heart lurch. He had lost her. _Again_. He stood slowly,
still watching that spot as if she would somehow reappear. She did no such
thing. He vaguely heard Hotohori-sama speaking with Taiitsu-kun, telling
her how grateful that they all were. He felt a soft tug on his skirt and
looked down - a Nyan-Nyan was staring up at him with wide, smiling eyes.
He forced a smile onto his face and knelt down next to her, "What is it, little
one?"
She smiled, "Me cure?"
Nuriko frowned and
asked, "What do you mean? I have no injuries." He cringed inwardly,
remembering the last conversation that had started like this - ~I'll heal
your perversion.~ she'd said.
The Nyan-Nyan lifted a hand to
rest it on his chest, over his heart. She smiled up at him, "Me cure."
Nuriko swallowed hard as a lump of tears formed in his
throat. He shook his head mutely and slowly stood up, "No. You can't
fix that, little one. Gomen ne." The Nyan-Nyan frowned at him, but
scampered away as she was dismissed. Nuriko wrapped his arms around
himself and continued to stare at the spot that his beloved imouto had just
vacated. He heard a voice to his left.
"Oi, Nuriko - we
should head back to the capital. Taiitsu-kun said that she'll transport us
back to where the horses are," Tamahome said.
Nuriko nodded and
dragged an arm across his eyes before joining his fellow seishi. "Hai,
Tamahome-kun."
When Taiitsu-kun stepped up to them, she gave
Nuriko a sympathetic look. Nuriko returned it with a startled one of his
own. Before he could say anything, though, they were back in the woods,
their horses grazing quietly on the grass.
Hotohori grabbed the
reins of his gelding and swung himself into the saddle, not watching as the
other two seishi mounted up. Tamahome moved his horse up next to the
Emperor's, leaving Nuriko to ride behind them. Nuriko hung his head and
tried to ignore the lump that was once again rising in his throat -
Hotohori-sama wanted nothing to do with him. That much was clear. He
must have disgusted the other man beyond his meager ability to patch things
up. At least Tamahome had spoken to him before...
The ride
back to the capital was made in silence. Nuriko had tried to lighten the
mood once or twice, but the baleful glares he received in response stilled his
vocal chords. He rode, shrunk into the saddle, eyes stinging. As
they approached the palace gates, the Emperor spoke.
"Tamahome,
Nuriko - as Suzaku Seishi you have the right to rooms in the palace, should you
wish to use them. The servants will see to your comforts for as long as
you decide to stay." He dismounted, handing his horse over to one of the
guards and marching swiftly back towards the palace. Tamahome did the
same, leaving Nuriko sitting on his horse, alone, outside the gates. One
of the guards spoke up, "Lady Kourin-sama? Shall we have someone escort
you inside?"
Nuriko gave voice to a bitter bark of laughter as he
dismounted. He shook his head as he handed over the reins, "No. I
can find my own way." Not waiting for the guards to protest, Nuriko
gathered up the tattered skirts of his traveling dress and ran for the relative
safety of his rooms. He thought he heard a few snickers on the way back,
but he shut his ears and merely upped his speed.
When he reached
his rooms, he slammed the door behind him and leaned heavily against it. A
soft patter of footfalls made him look up, "Emi? What are you doing
here?" The cruel laughing that he'd heard convinced him that the servants
all knew of his deception - he'd figured that Emi would be gone by the time he
returned.
Emi gave him a sad, little smile and said, "You really
look terrible, Nuriko-sama. I've drawn you a bath - you'll feel better
after you wash up."
Nuriko didn't know whether to laugh or
cry. Nuriko-sama. Oh, Emi knew all right. The question
remained - why was she still here? The crawling of his skin made the
decision for him - the bath first, questions later. He walked to the
bathing room and stripped off his clothing. Before he took off the slacks,
he straightened to take in his form in the mirror. The first time that he
had really done so during his mature lifetime. The decidedly flat planes
of his chest evoked a red flush across his features. Why do I have to
be so different? Even when I admitted to myself and everyone else that I
was a man... Why do I still feel this way towards the Emperor?
He angrily tore off the rest of his clothes and immersed himself in the
bath. I'm a pervert. Just some sick, unnatural... pervert.
That's what they all think. How do I know it's not true?
He washed himself quickly and drew himself out of the bath, reaching for his
robe and wrapping it quickly around himself. He walked back into the main
room to find Emi sitting in her small chair by his vanity - Kourin's brush in
her hands. He sat down in his own chair, cheeks still flushed. Emi
lifted the brush and began to run it through his wet hair. After several
minutes of utter silence, Nuriko could take it no longer. He spun around
and grabbed Emi's wrist, "Well??"
Emi frowned at him, "Well what,
Nuriko-sama?"
Nuriko's mouth dropped open and he let go of her
wrist. He opened the front of his robe and stared down at his chest,
"This! Aren't you going to say something? Don't tell me you
didn't know!"
Emi calmly grabbed the flaps of his robe and pulled
them closed, retying the sash. She picked up the brush and started running
it through his hair again. She hummed a little until Nuriko started to
relax under her ministrations. When he had calmed down, she smiled a
little. Her voice was quiet when it emerged, "I have served you faithfully
for over a year now, Nuriko-sama."
Nuriko's cheeks turned red
again, "And because of that, no one will accept you anywhere else, now, is that
it?" He turned his face away.
Emi's hand lifted to Nuriko's
chin and turned his head to face her. Her own was stern and her lips were
turned down at the corners, "That's enough, Nuriko-sama. It should be
enough that I am willing to stay with you. You need not know why."
She let go of his chin and laid the brush down on the vanity, "If you wish to
dismiss me, then I will go."
Nuriko quickly shook his head, fear
alighting on his features. Emi smiled a little, "You will be wanting
clothing...?" She let the sentence hang, leaving it to Nuriko to fill in
what kind of clothing he would wish.
Quietly, he asked Emi to
find him a long tunic and a pair of pants. She nodded and left to find
them. Nuriko turned to the mirror and picked up a pair of scissors,
hefting his thick hair in the other hand. Just as he was about to hack it off,
he dropped the scissors. I can't do it... Not yet. He
picked up a tie and pulled his hair back into a functional braid that reached to
below his hips. He dressed quickly in the clothing that Emi brought,
slipping into a simple pair of slippers as he tied the gold sash around his
waist.
He walked to the mirror and stared at his reflection -
even in men's clothing he looked like a girl! He'd never thought that a
disadvantage before... He shook his head ruefully and pulled open the door
to his rooms. Emi had gone off somewhere - maybe to find more clothing
that would suit Nuriko's newly emerging tastes. He didn't really care -
what he wanted now, was a moment alone. He made his way out to the lake
and dropped down to a convenient boulder, knees to his chest. He felt
altogether too exposed in the clothing he now wore - and not very comfortable,
either. He shut off that train of thought. He was going to try to
wear men's clothing - at least for a little while each day. Even if he
still felt like a women inside, he could at least try to look like a man on the
outside. He turned his gaze to the water and merely sat, enjoying the
stillness for a while.
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